Danielle Adelaide's (Nellie) Birth Story

I reminisce about Nellie, (her given birth name is Danielle).

We were camping with friends in the Napa Valley at the state park just south of Calistoga. Ronnie was off playing golf with the guys and I was taking a little hike with James and Jessica to pick blackberries. While we were playing, picking and eating, I am sure that I caught presence of a gentle fairy spirit. To me, my daughter has this energy about her. Later that evening we were relaxing with our friends around the campfire, we were talking about the children and somehow the discussion got around to "Are you having any more children?" Ronnie and I both responded with a resounding, "Yes, we want one more." Danielle was conceived that night in our tent in Napa Valley.

The next day, unaware of what was occurring in my body at that very moment, I took my two girlfriends with me to the hot springs in Calistoga to have a mud bath. We had a gloriously, fun filled, messy time. Later I wondered if the hot mud had something to do with Danielle's conception? It was an early conception by the charting method.

A few days later I was practicing yoga with a friend and I observed that I was finally opening up with my stretching. It was at that moment, I realized I was pregnant , due to the feeling of how the Relaxin hormone felt like in my body.

I had to let go of a lot before I was ready to welcome this pregnancy. I was of two minds, both excited and scared. It took the first trimester for me fully surrender to this pregnancy. Our family's budget was tight; we were trying to save all the money we could to make the big move back east. Now looking back, I see that it was perfect timing to have Danielle. We needed to complete our family before we made the big move. Once I was fully welcoming to this pregnancy and baby, I became very excited and wanted to experience all that I could through this baby's birth.

I pushed Ronnie to deliver this one. Although he was initially resistant to the idea, he came around in the end. When the day arrived he truly was at his best. This one was to be an underwater birth in a standard bathtub. I also wanted it to be a lotus birth, something I had learned about from Jeannine Parvati.

Jeannine taught us about the Blessingway ceremony (see birth rituals on the website) and I was preparing to do ours two weeks before Danielle was due. Danielle's Blessingway was attended by a few close friends, who were there to support our family in this transition, to welcome this new life into the world. Ronnie had a similar explosion of emotion before the Blessingway as when I was in labor with Jessica. I was pleased then that the Blessingway seemed to clear away the fear that he had in Jessica's birth. At Danielle's birth Ronnie was able to feel calm and collected. He faced his fears, including having the cord wrapped around Danielle's neck, he was able to handle it beautifully.

I used a set of birth beads for both Jessica and Danielle. These are symbols of strength that have served each woman in their respective pregnancy. Together they form a strong weave of different women's stories and challenges that were faced, giving each successive woman more power than the one that came before. (For further information, look for Birth Beads on the website).

With two children to care for during my third pregnancy it became harder to take care of myself. I did trade some massages, and was able to receive massage both during pregnancy and postpartum. However, this time I was insistent on taking care of myself in the postpartum period with massages, moxa bustion therapy and more rest time. This was wisdom I had gained from my first two births and the exhaustion that followed afterwards.

I was working a lot during this pregnancy, doing both massage and teaching yoga. I was blessed and honored to have the chance to work on John Denver and his team. At the time I was six months pregnant. I massaged John, his business manager and his personal manager while they were at Lake Tahoe for the John Denver celebrity ski tournament. I was invited to his show by John himself. Watching the nature films that John showed during his performances were an inspiration to me. I choose the song Calypso that he wrote for Jacques Cousteau and the image of a whale moving in the water for my water birth vision. I bought the cassette tape that had the song I wanted and used both Calypso and Fly like an Eagle for Danielle's birth music. It was perfect. Danielle hears this story often and we both feel sad when we think about John Denver.

As my due date neared we were also making plans to move our young family back to the east coast. It was important to us to have our children raised near family. We moved when Danielle was six months old, Jessica was three and James was six and a half. I was grateful that I had the knowledge to insist upon taking care of myself for the first six weeks postpartum. I was stronger during the move because of it.

There was an astrological component to Danielle's story. I had predicted when she would arrive with my astrological awareness of planetary changes. Hope, a friend of mine, who is an acupuncturist and massage therapist, flew up from LA to be at the birth. I had told her that if she came a day later she would've been too late. I was right, when Hope arrived Sunday morning, my labor had already begun. Danielle was born fourteen hours later, just after midnight.

Danielle's labor began with some drama. I woke to a loud pop that morning and looked inside my refrigerator to discover a bottle of crystal geyser water from Calistoga had frozen at the back of the refrigerator and exploded into small slivers. I started cleaning it out piece by piece and as I squatted and cried, my water began to leak out. With my labor still manageable, I went to go pick up Hope at the airport.

Later that afternoon during a walk around the neighborhood I wondered why many of my neighbors were gathered at the end of the street. It turned out that a tree up on top of the mountain above our house was on fire. There was a helicopter flying over head to put the fire out with some dust. Jeannine had told us in her workshop that "Birth is like being struck by lightening and surviving." I wondered if that tree was a reminder that I would survive.

My friend Phyllis, and fellow home birth mom, was having her blessingway that evening. We attended the Blessingway, as Ronnie headed off to work, knowing we would call him home when the labor began to intensify. As the ceremony progressed so did my labor. At one point a friend, Kelly commented that she could feel my contractions, I would squeeze her hand in a rhythm of every five to six minutes. I knew it was time to go home, the contractions were getting stronger.

I returned home to a cup of tea fixed by Hope and began to prepare for the water birth. We called Ronnie and told him to come home. I gave myself a gentle enema, so I could avoid contaminating the bathtub during the delivery. This caused my contractions to come on stronger. I began to understand why enemas were once a common component of the birth protocol, used to stimulate labor. I was in the tub with John Denver in the background singing Calypso, I sang along with him as I rocked back and forth. It was lovely and intense yet quick and easy at the same time. For a few brief moments I called out that I could not do it, but before I knew it Danielle was born into her father's hands.

The placenta was delivered into the placenta bowl as I walked down the hall to the bedroom. Kate cleaned the placenta while I held Danielle. We had a lotus birth, which is performed when the cord is never cut from the child, but allowed to dry out with the use of herbs, and is gently broken when ready. Danielle stayed attached to her placenta for thirty six hours and her cord was completely off of her navel in three days. This is the fastest and easiest release of the umbilical cord stump of all my children.

Although I had massage and chiropractic work throughout the pregnancy and birth, this time I made sure I was cared for in the postpartum phase. Hope began the postpartum mother roasting by applying moxa bustion to my uterus, lower back and a few other acupressure points within hours after the birth. I drank high grade moxa tea as well.

My afterbirth pains were lessened with the application of heat. I tend to be cold natured, therefore, the heat was healing to me in the postpartum phase. It had the opposite effect for Phyllis, a friend who gave birth at home just three days after me, causing her to bleed more, as she is more hot natured than I am. For me the moxabustion allowed clots to release and the bleeding to slow down.

I received the postpartum massages I had traded for during the pregnancy every two weeks for the first six. I even took the first ten days to just enjoy my baby in the bedroom, only nursing, eating and sleeping when Danielle slept. It was a gift to have that time because before I knew it we were ready to move.

Danielle's placenta was planted in a pot with a rubber tree plant over it. It moved with us and the earth in the pot was placed in front of the house I still live in today, where we raised our three children. The placenta was never putrid or offensive.

Danielle has become the one with the healing hands and heart. She is currently a nurse at Duke working with cancer patients. She chose this calling to be a nurse after her father, Ronnie, passed at the age of fifty one from cancer. Her dreams include that she may go on to midwifery. She also shares Jeannie Parvati's same birth date, and it was Jeannine who inspired much of how Danielle was birthed.